Today figures to be Black Friday in more ways than one for Hog fans. But, the good news is there are less than 14 shopping days left until Athletic Director Jeff Long will present an anxious fan base with a new leader.
In the meantime, we are running out of time to hate on our college football brethren. So, let’s Snark ‘Til We Drop.
The only rules for this column are that the fake user names can’t be longer than 15 characters (but may or may not be registered, already), the Tweets cannot exceed 140 characters, and I have to end each one with a smarmy hash tag. Let’s have some hateful fun.
Nebraska at Iowa: @Meladonttunein: Forget L-Tryptophan. This game is why your weird Uncle Bill will be passed out on the sofa. #canwedriveyoutotheairport?
LSU at Arkansas: @FayetteDamned: This Turkey of a season can’t end soon enough for Arkansas. #isitmeordoesthatwishbonelooklikeaHornedFrog?
Michigan at Ohio State: @KFC-Bus: A man named Urb dreaming of a perfect season vs. a Man & 1/2 named Brady dreaming of perfect herbs & seasonings. #fatfingerlickingood
Kentucky at Tennessee: @SourMashed: There will be over 100,000 in the stands at Neyland Stadium. Whiskey bottles, that is. #and50,000fans
Oregon at Oregon St. @CivilShepherd: Nike needs to develop a dark brown uni for Oregon’s annual late-November bed soiling, #Duck,duck,duck,cookedgoose
Georgia Tech at Georgia :@WreckedTech: Knick Knack Paddy Wack, throw the Dawgs a Wishbone. #actuallyGTwillhanditoff
Auburn at Alabama: @$180,000: Chizik is about to enjoy a paid vacation. SEC fans will enjoy the vacation of a(n) (allegedly) paid (for) title. #doestheDevilhaveabuyout?
Florida at Florida State: @GainesVile: Free Shoes University v. No Shoes University. #noshirt,noshoes+jorts=noproblem
Oklahoma St. at Oklahoma: @AxisofEden: OU fans aren’t too worried about little brother. Abel wasn’t either. #isthatforbiddenfruitonOK’sonlytree?
Vanderbilt at Wake Forest: @JacobMarley: The Ghost of Coaching Searches Past v. The Toast of Coaching Searches Present & Future. #VUwillbeattheDickensoutofWF
Stanford at UCLA: @Mora!Mora!: UCLA did the impossible and humbled Lane Kiffin for a few hours last week. #OK,morelikeafewminutes
Missouri at Texas A&M: @TooflessTigers: DGB=Don’t Go Bowling. #butatleasthenowhasmoreTDsthannames
South Carolina at Clemson: @verklemptSon: Spurrier hates Dabo. Dabo hates Spurrier. #weknowhowtheyfeel
Mississippi St. at Mississippi: @FinishHimHuey: Hugh Freeze has made Mississippi fans forget their former coach. #untilthe4thquarter
Notre Dame at USCW:@MantiTe’NO: Even Sarah Palin thinks Te’o's Heisman candidacy is a joke. #youcansee43tacklersfromhere
La. Tech at San Jose St. @GrowingPains: Colby Cameron hates losing worse than Kirk Cameron hates the GP theme song. #becauseitwassungbyaguynamedBJ
