Special to BlogHawgs from Kris M. Boyd

Put me in,.....Coach?
Bill Simmons wrote a short column for ESPN The Magazine several years ago calling for Mike Dunleavy to be fired as the coach of the Los Angeles Clippers and for then player Sam Cassell to be named as his replacement. Simmons’ justification was that Sam Cassell could do just as good of a job as Dunleavy and, in all actuality, coaches in the NBA are not necessary. He pointed out that NBA coaches are hired and fired left and right and outside of Phil Jackson, Greg Popovich and Jerry Sloan, really don’t bring anything to the table .
It was nice column and I had all but forgotten about it until I saw how Los Angeles Lakers head coach Mike Brown responded to an inquiry about Kobe Bryant hoisting up 75 shots in his last three games. “This is a players’ league.” Brown stated. “Your best player has to allow you to coach him.”
To quote Brett with two T’s quoting a nonsensical and intoxicated friend of ours… “Scume?”
I’m not disagreeing with Brown, but to admit something that most of us have wondered opens a huge door. Do NBA teams really need head coaches? I’m sure some probably do. But what about the teams, like the Lakers, who are really led by a single player? Can’t we bring back the player-coach?
NBA teams change head coaches like the GOP changes party favorites. There was an 18-month period in 2003-2004 when over 19 NBA head coaching jobs changed hands. Can anyone tell me with a straight face that some of those teams couldn’t have at least had the same record with players doing the motivating, calling out screens, timeouts, in-bound plays and substitutions?
Let’s be frank. NBA coaches do the least of all head coaches in the three major sports (hockey is not a major sport). Football coaches have their hands involved in every single play in the game. Baseball managers have very complicated game plans hatched out depending on who their (and the opposing team’s) starting pitcher is, who is available in the bullpens, line-ups, etc (with the obvious exception of Bobby Valentine). But NBA coaches…? Don’t they screw up games more than enhance them?
There have been 40 player-coaches in the NBA. Bill Russell won two Championships as a player-coach so we know it can work. The last one was Dave Cowens in 1979. Part of the salary cap of the collective bargaining agreement of 1983 prohibits player-coaches because the league did not want to allow a team to pay a player-coach $10 million as a coach and the league minimum as a player in order to circumvent the cap. That’s the problem? Really? This isn’t scientific rockets (old Danny Ford joke)here. The solution: A team must count 100% of the player-coach’s combined salary towards its cap. Ok, solved that. Next problem? Oh yeah, the NBA Coaches Union.
Let’s forget about it for a minute, co-op Simmons’ idea and dive into all 29 teams (Charlotte is not a real NBA team) to discuss whether they really need a coach, and if they don’t, who should be the player-coach.
Eastern Conference
Boston Celtics: It seems the obvious choice would be Kevin Garnett… until you actually watch KG on the court. KG needs someone to calm him the eff down. Jesus Shuttlesworth would be a great player-coach.
New Jersey Nets: Deron Williams? Uh. No. This is the guy who forced Utah to get rid of its legendary coach, Jerry Sloan, and even after he did so, still forced a trade. Kris Kardashian? No thanks. The good Lopez brother? (This is me talking with my mouth real big and over-pronouncing every word) The New Jersey Nets just need to stick with Avery Johnson.
New York Knicks: Mike D’Antoni was built to coach this team, even if they are losing. Besides, if you are a Knicks fan, do you really want Carmelo Anthony or Amar’e Stoudemire coaching?
Philadelphia 76’ers: Have you looked at their roster? Yikes. Could J. Erving, M.D. come out of retirement?
Toronto Raptors: JAMAAL MAGLOIRE IS STILL IN THE LEAGUE?!?! Um, they should stay with Dwayne Casey, whoever that is, or contract.
Chicago Bulls: Derrick Rose could coach this team. Easily. “Ok, guys, on this in-bound play, just like last time, in-bound the ball to me and get out of the way.”
Cleveland Cavaliers: I’m quite positive Antawn Jamison could lead the Cavs to just as many wins losses as Byron Scott.
Detroit Pistons: I’ve always liked Tayshaun Prince. Teammates like him as well. Does anybody really think Detroit is better off paying Lawrence Frank $2 million a year to lose games and bury Brandon Knight on the bench?
Indiana Pacers: Danny Granger needs to coach this team. He does everything else for it, anyway.
Milwaukee Bucks: I don’t want to live in a world where Stephen Jackson doesn’t get a chance to coach an NBA team.
Atlanta Hawks: I’d say Joe Johnson but, sadly, Joe doesn’t have a leadership bone in his body. I’d say Josh Smith, but he would still try to shoot terrible three’s even when he is coaching from the bench. They probably need to stay with. . . Larry Drew?!?! Well, maybe the Hawks are better off with Josh Smith jacking threes from the coach’s box.
Charlotte Bobcats: I said I wasn’t going to include them because they are not a real team, but I nominate Eduardo Najera to be the player-coach if only because he is almost 40 years old.
Miami Heat: This is Dwayne Wade’s team. Everyone, including LeBron James, knows that.
Orlando Magic: Dwight Howard. Everyone on the Magic likes Dwight Howard. We should probably name a successor coach, however, because Dwight Howard doesn’t like everyone on the Magic.
Washington Wizards: It would be impossible for John Wall to coach this team to a worse record right? I mean, come on Wizard fans, what is the worst that could happen? The team messes around and actually wins a game?
I’ll be doing the Western Conference next week as Dad, aka Adam Butler, told me that this was getting too long.
Quarterback Tyler Wilson to Return to Arkansas for 2012 Season
Posted by Adam Butler on January 13, 2012
In recent days, All-SEC running back Knile Davis and play-making wide receiver Cobi Hamilton have announced their intentions to return to Arkansas for the 2012 season and forego the NFL Draft, as well.
We are very glad we were wrong on this. We can’t wait to get the band back together.
Posted in Commentary, Sports | Tagged: Arkansas Razorbacks, Cobi Hamilton, Knile Davis, Tyler Wilson | Leave a Comment »